Past

I still can’t seem to get right

I keep on with the furious fight

The breaking of my heart and soul

My mind split like uncared for soil

Waking each morning with hope

Only to have it crushed by the slope

So slippery and cold my thoughts fall

Begging for reprieve for it to stall

The circle of thoughts that are constant

My past is like a disease like a demon

That let’s me feel peace for short breaths

Only to return with great fury and depth

Nuanced drenched my thoughts will race

My actions are slow to keep a fast pace

Once I have shown who I am to the world

I go back to my thoughts and they unfurl

They bring me back to the reality of loss

Of moments taken by the sticky moss

That decays my daily chances of love

Where is my rainbow where is the dove

That will lead me out of this dark circle

And bring me to peace to the sweet temple

The temple of now of Buddha of suffering

Suffering as part of life and learning

Life both happiness and immense pain

If given the chance I would do it again

Buddha And Meaning

I fail to see the meaning here

Buddha asked for no statues

No worship no praise

Other than those that learn the ways

The ways of spirituality

For saying no and receiving more

Under the Bodhi Tree he sat for many days

His fortune and title thrown out

Like an old useless pair of shoes

He searched for meaning through suffering

He found no meaning in suffering

He found it in the overcoming

The understanding of that suffering

500 years after his death

The first statue arrived

Over 2000 years later I find myself here

In the presence of thousands of Buddha statues

I find one with money in its hand

I doubt this is what he meant by meaning

More than Love

Love is more than holding the door

Love is removing all obstacles

Love is more than cooking dinner

Love is gracefully doing the dishes

Love is more than picking a flower

Love is tilling the soil with smiles

Love is more than writing a poem

Love is action and caring

Love is not simply saying you’re sorry

Love is never having to say the words

Newgrange

Take a trip to the tombs of Newgrange

Built by people from the Neolithic age

Over 5000 years ago

The sun shines in the doorways giving light

To all parts of the tomb with remains in sight

Built to withstand the punishing wind and rain

Stones brought from over 30 miles away

To provide homage to their ancestors and stay

Through the cold dark terrifying nights

The people huddled close family was life

When it was darkest they would build fire

Not only to keep warm but also to inspire

Fire for all people to see

Those scared could know community

They reached out to fellow humans

And cared about their ancestors

They also shared their knowledge

For future generations

Through meaning and lasting decisions

As we feel alone today may we remember

That they never were alone they were together

Dogs and Children

Strolling in a park in Michigan

With a dog and three children

Never has life been so simple

Like a living loving temple

I left a bit of my heart there

So that others might compare

Not in a competition or fight

But so they could see the light

There is nothing more special

Than seeing kids be helpful

Caring for a vulnerable animal

That love for them is rational

I think we should take a lesson

From the loving acts of children

They are the insight to our past

And truth that love will last

So take your dogs on a walk

Take them to a natural park

Bring your niece or nephew

Hold the moment hold the view

As we grow old and leave this place

Our life will come to the surface

Will you remember the bills you paid

And the fortunes you displayed

Or will the light beat the dark

As you remember that day in the park

Saying Sorry

I think about this word
How important and overused
It can be a flower or sword
In sound hands still abused

Nothing is ever really done
By saying to you I’m sorry
Only by a selfless action
Can I tell you a new story

We say sorry like vast clouds
With all our truth and pain
Some apologies spoken are void
And all of the uses bring rain

I think of my loving partner
The one I say sorry to most
I think not saying another
Would be better to boast

With confidence and compassion

We can guide our loving story

If hope leads our hard decisions

We can end saying we’re sorry

Mean Things

How does your heart feel

When you say mean things

Like an onion about to peel

Do you cry or do you sing

Is it easy to say those words

And also easy to forget

If your tongue is a sword

Use it for good and not regret

So many hurtful reactions

That bloom from mean things

Most of all your conscious

Guilt is a blackened ring

See you don’t just hurt one

You hurt us all together

It’s not just you it’s your sons

That bear this burden forever

I Remember

My Father
I Remember
It was never easy being his son
But I wish I could go back to that moment
Would I have said anything differently
Just a child would I have had the words
I never cared for his troubles only mine
Didn’t even know they existed
Would anger be all that I had to share
Could there have been a longer hug
I don’t know I don’t get a second chance
Swimming in that pool that night
The feeling of pure joy surrounded me
Like the water that was enveloping my body
So was the love I felt in my soul
See he had changed his approach
Maybe it was God or maybe it was just growth
I watched him in that moment be a great father
He was only getting started
As I climbed out of the pool there she was
A woman I don’t even remember her face
She drove me to the hospital and no one knew
No one knew but me that this was it
He was gone and he wasn’t coming back
And I hated him for it so much I hated him
The preacher said God needed him in his company
That was very difficult for me to believe
I needed him then and I need him today
27 years later I recall that last moment
The music the dancing those glasses on his face
And he spoke those words his final words to me
I love you son and I will always love you
As if he knew that would be his last moment
I miss you father and I know why I was so angry
I forgive you I forgive you I am sorry
You are with me and I know this to be true
Now if I am blessed with a child I will remember
I will remember the last message you gave me
Love no need to remember more